13 Comments
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Elle's avatar

Kier , you’ve set a precedence for relevancy that is unmatched - thank you. With the title alone , validation of those traumatized is clear. Regarding the context - This is so applicable…. And so, is there a chance , that it extends into a case where the unresolved trauma of that person, now ends up spilling into their adult relationships , ie marriage? Where now, they are causing or have caused trauma to their significant other and will not hold themselves accountable ??

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Saalihah 'Moon''s avatar

This was a refreshing read. For me, it is easier to accept that someone may not take upon the duty of accountability than it is for me to continuously check myself for craving their understanding, especially when this craving has been a part of your existence for so long. However, two things can exist at the same time which I assume is the reality of healing - the multifaceted nature of understanding and longing. I am so proud of us for trying!

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Soleil's avatar

My dad doesn't even recognize the role he plays in his own trauma, so it's a little easier not to take it personally. He's just unaccountable in general, it's not specific to me, or anyone else who may just so happen to fall in his path.

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Leumas Angel's avatar

I love this. Thanks for sharing.❤️

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Andrew Cerafica's avatar

this has helped so much to read this, especially the part about breaking from ‘dependent healing’ wow. much love brother 🤘🏽💫

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B I G  A R I's avatar

My chest hurts, I wasn’t ready to read this 🥹❤️‍🩹

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Enduring Voices's avatar

This really clearly puts into perspective some things I’ve been thinking about with my own personal trauma from my relationships with my parents. It’s also made me think harder about the trauma my children will/are experiencing as we go through a reconfiguration of our lives through divorce. I want to make sure that I remember to acknowledge their pain and reconcile for my part in it in ways that are meaningful.

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Afterhourhighlights's avatar

I’m so glad I read this!

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Jacquie Verbal's avatar

You are on Substack too?

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Adriana Ambrosio's avatar

Thank you for this Kier.

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Kathilia Edghill's avatar

So so good. Thank you for this Kier

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Flibbertygibit's avatar

This timing was perfect. Thank you for putting this into words.

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